This is a blog about our journey of adoption from the beginning;
typed by me, written by God.

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Our Baby

Our precious baby girl, Alyssa Michelle, gets to go home, to Jesus. As we were on the way to PA this morning, passing through Abilene, TX, we got a call from the agency worker who spoke with the doctors this morning. 
Our baby isn't able to breathe well anymore, she has lost the ability to swallow, and has some other problems that just came up overnight. We had to make a hard decision this morning for her... Prolong her life artificially with surgery and an iv, etc (which would be more painful for her - and she still probably won't make it through) or make her as comfortable as possible and let her go home to her Father. We decided to keep her as comfortable as possible. Since we haven't signed the papers, nothing is legal. She is still "Baby Girl" at the hospital and is in custody of the state, but we believe she is ours (emotionally at least).

We decided to turn around and go home because it's likely that she won't make it until we get there. If she did, her body would be mostly shut down that we would mostly be up there to say goodbye to her. We feel God is telling us that we need to go home and process through this. We will have the next 3 days together before the hubby goes back to work.
We are almost back home... tired (as we drove nearly through the night except for 2 hours of sleep on the side of the road), sad and yet rejoicing that she will be happy and healthy with Jesus.

We didn't get to meet you here, but we will meet you someday in heaven our dear baby girl! We love you!!
 Please keep us in your prayers as we look to God and move through this. We believe everything happens in His will and timing. Caleb believes that He has a better plan for us and our future child(ren). Even though we can't see it now, we know He will get us through and lead us to our perfect child someday.


  1. Oh heart hurts for you guys. What a difficult road you're walking! I am thankful that Jesus is your firm foundation, and you are both trusting in Him as you follow. I am so encouraged by your faith...and still excited to see what He has in store for you.

    1. Thanks for all your prayers, Mandy! Your faith last year helped me grow in my own faith and love for Jesus. I thank God for you and your family. Hope you all are doing well. Miss ya and love you all!